Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Yes, This Really Happened.

Living in a house with 6 children and half of them still needing help (mothers insistence) in the bathroom......I am therefore the designated "wiper" for a few bums.  So, considering our higher than normal fiber intake, it is quit frequently I am hearing, usually yelled, "MOM, COME WIPE ME!"  Nice.  I'm fine with this.  It's my job. 

Today I heard a subdued, "Mom, (long pause) can you come wipe me?"  I was in the middle of tutoring someone in their math and writing out General Science flash cards so it took me a few seconds to switch gears from "teacher" to "bum wiper", but being the supermom I am, it took me only brief seconds to make this adjustment.

I cracked open the bathroom door to see a small child sitting on the commode, with his head bowed and resting in his hands. 

Small talk works best in situations like this.

"Hey, What's up?"

"I peed on my head."


The child raised their face out of their hands and sure enough.....wet hair on the forehead. 

"Oh," I said, "then you should probably get in the bathtub and wash your hair."


Considering that the victim was of the male gender, I was pretty sure that waiting until the last possible second and hasty aiming -or lack of- were the main factors in this strange case.

So, into the bathtub in the middle of the day and being the versatile mother I am, I quickly transformed myself into "Child Cleansing Mode".  A little lavender oil and shampoo does a wonderful transformation and soon this discourage soul was soothed and on his way smelling heavenly and feeling refreshed.

What a memory.


  1. You are more versatile than "Hank the Cow Dog", switching between all of these "modes"; even in the commode. You and your hubby are great people.

  2. Hilarious!!! I only wish there were a picture of the little guy on the toilet with head in his hands, or maybe one of him on the commode with those big eyes looking up at you through the strip of wet locks.

  3. HAHAHAHAhahahaha!! Good stuff. :)